Parental Instruction and the Attack on the Family
Home-schooling is on a dramatic rise across America. Every day, more and more parents discover this wonderful advantage for their children. Today’s homeschooler parents are the new American pioneers. They “speak softly and carrying a very influential stick.” They represent an alternative to conventional education. And the winner is… the family and America. These pioneer parents are the trendsetters for the future of American education. Interested parents who do not home-school or cannot be homeschoolers should contact parents who are, and find a way to join together to educate in-home.
Public school systems need to rethink their philosophy of education. The tremendous cost to run our public schools and the safety and security of students and teachers against lawlessness, bullying, and disrespect from some students, are only part of the problems we face as parents and educators. Protecting students from each other on the inside of the school building speaks of a much deeper problem outside the school building. That problem is in the home. It speaks of failure of parents to discipline and teach their children the principles of respect for authority, respect for individual human rights, respect for privacy, and respect for freedom. Freedom is the exercise and respect of individual volition without bullying, coercion, and interference.
Think on these things:
Family members go in different directions away from each other because each family member is too busy with their own agenda. Individual agendas must not be at the expense of family. School activities and school friends should not be allowed to interfere with family time. Children need the love and leadership of parents and each other. Children need attention, affirmation (affirmation is especially important) and discipline by parents first, not just from our teachers and administrators. Your family is important to America and our way of life. As goes the family, so goes the nation. Parental instruction in righteousness is not the public schools’ responsibility—it is yours, parent, it is yours.
Children must be taught respect for the laws of divine establishment. But that cannot happen when parents themselves do not know these laws. They are found in God’s Word and they are instituted by God for the preservation of each family and each nation. “The family who prays together, stays together,” is more than a cliché, it is a mandate for family togetherness. It is the family exercising faith together. Prayer is the privilege and the opportunity for intimacy with God and each family member
Think before you answer these two questions:
- When our families become dysfunctional, what do you think becomes of society?
- Who is the parent in your family—you or your child? Be brave enough to answer honestly. If the answer is not you, then changes need to be made in your home. Immediately.
Point of truth:
No parent should say to their child, “Hey, buddy…”
Your minor child is not your friend. God does not call us to be “friends” or “buddies” with our children (not until they grow up). He calls parents to instruct and discipline their children in the ways of the Lord (not to try to impress them so they like you more, or make them think you’re cool). Parents were ordained by God to be the authority in their children’s lives, with the Lord in the position of highest and final authority in the family. You and your child are not peers, so stop treating them as if you were. You’re the parent, in charge, and they are the child, in obedience to you.
A parent loses authority in the child’s eyes every time the parent calls the child “buddy.” And parents should never ask if a child wants to do something (i.e. chores, homework/studying…), the parent tells the child what to do, and the child obeys. When it’s time to go somewhere, the parent says, “Let’s go,” and not, “Hey, buddy. Do you want to wake up and go to church now?” (And, yes. I’ve heard parents say these things, and worse.) Parents are not there to be walked on, bullied, or pushed around by their children.
The foundation of America, and any nation, is the family, as designed by God. Each family foundation must have a Cornerstone—Jesus Christ. The proper function of society centers in the home—the very family. And this is why the enemy works so hard to destroy the family unit. We must not allow this to happen. Parents must consistently self-evaluate and keep an eagle’s eye on the members of the family. No one gets left behind. No one goes unchallenged when sin comes to light. “…Correction and instruction in righteousness…” (2 Timothy 3:16) are critical to the proper function of the family unit.
The self does not a family make
Houses are empty when no one is at home, and they are empty when occupied if there is no togetherness—no time for each other. Families make a house a home. Home is family. Family is giving and caring, sharing and loving, sister and brother, mom and dad, church and God. If these attributes described each of our families in America, most all of our societal issues would be non-existent.
All solutions for the problems of man, and each nation, begins with respect for God. Come home America—come back to God (repent) while there is still time. We must return to “one Nation under God.” America must recover its heritage. Our heritage and our pride in America must be taught in our school systems, our churches, and especially by parents in the home. We can only remain indivisible with freedom and justice for all, when we respect God and each other.
Two-parent families need the leadership of God the Father. Single-parent families especially need God as mentor and Father.
WOTM recommends “family time” as a beginning for reuniting your family. Parents are the leaders of the family, and they must lead.
As stated above, houses filled with people who do not spend time together are empty houses. If you live in an empty house, do something about it. Take action!
As a parent, tell your family that you want to have a meeting and everyone must make time to attend, no exceptions. Sit down at the dinner table or in the living/family room. Talk to each other live and in person—no texting, no cell phones—turn them off. No TV, no music, no whining. Now, inform your family that you are establishing a “family time” once each week for sharing and caring.
Tell them that togetherness and giving attention to each other is going to have a regular time and place in our family. Giving attention to each other is the true joy of giving—giving of yourselves to each other. We are family! Don’t let anything or anyone keep your family from Family Time.
When you meet for the first Family Time session, let your family know that you are also establishing Church Time at least once each week (but preferably every time the doors are open). “We are going to church together.” So, from their busy schedule each week they must relinquish time for church—time for God. Every family can make (give) time each week for each other and for God. Fill Family Time with listening and sharing and maybe a hug or two.
Most importantly, let your children know that you are on their side, that it is not you against them, it is you, as a family, against the world. You are for them, and not against them. Make these times FUN. Cause them to look forward to this time together because of how wonderful you’ve made that time. Build memories. Share memories from your own childhood, and ask what each of their favorite memories are of their life so far. Once or twice a year, open the old photo albums—relive memories and make new ones at the same time.
Look your kids in the eye when they speak to you. Put down or stop whatever it is you’re doing and give them your full attention. If you don’t, someone else will, and that someone will eventually usurp your place. Your kids will listen to and be influenced by them, and not you.
Pick Your Battles
Not every single thing that a kid does wrong requires your immediate wrath and punishment. Instead of coming unglued over something minor, ask them what they’ve learned from the experience, let them know that everyone makes mistakes, but it is the fool who goes out and continues to make these same mistakes.
“Now you know what not to do, right?” Nod once, confidently, and say, “Lesson learned.” Smile at them, hold their gaze, then let it go.
Side note: If you establish things like family time, then you lessen the chances of your kids doing bad things or getting into trouble in the first place. They won’t seek wrong attention from the outside because they’re already getting the right attention… from you.
Hug them. Tell them you love them, especially in emotional situations. Look them in the eye; mean what you say and let them see it in your eyes. Remind them that it’s you and them, together, on the same team. Then, offer what help you can. Our family motto is, “It’s us against the world.”
True happiness is derived from inner peace. Inner peace begins at home, loving and caring and sharing one another. Love is all about giving. What are you giving to your family? Are you giving or taking? Give yourselves to each other.
WOTM recommends that you close Family Time with a simple prayer of “Thank you, Father, for our little family and our time together.”
Respect for God, God’s Word (the Bible), and each other is imperative to co-existence as a family and as a nation of nationalities.
Think on these things.
Happy Studying! Now, go have FUN with your family.
They need you.